Postcards from the Funny Farm

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Your answer to that question may be the reason you’re not getting what you want.

You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.

-Dale Carnegie

Of all his quotes, this one is the best in my opinion. It’s like the old adage your mother and father said when you were young: “If you want to have a friend, you have to be a friend.” Ah if it were only so simple to put into practice. Here’s a gem of knowledge I’ve picked up: aspirers to greatness, get out your pens.

When fettered by the pressures of the day, there is a way out. Well, I’ll call it a way through since “way out” connotes quitting. Instead of focusing on your pressures and concerns, tell yourself on the way to work or whatever it is you are doing: “I will try and help others first today.” You will find this to be a transformative experience that will open your mind more to those around you. As a result, you will be more accepting and your troubles will likely become easier to deal with. I wouldn’t recommend this unless I had tried it. And as always, I write it here in part to remind myself to use it. Try thinking of others above yourself tomorrow and see what happens. I think you’ll be pleased and surprised.

Owners do “walk-throughs” starting at the storefront. Then, they adjust and repair things accordingly. I have always seen a parallel in a storefront to the self.

When you enter a store, hopefully there is an owner who thinks about you, the customer. If you need something, he’ll guide you to that place. If you have a complaint, or if someone treats you unfairly, he’ll step in to make it right by you. Owners accept everything.

When I was an area coach for Pizza Hut, I used to love to see my managers out in front of the store picking up slips of trash and sweeping. It showed ownership. We as ordinary people seeking self-improvement need to step back and check our own storefront, which is “the self.”

Here are some points you might find on that sort of checklist:

Appearance: A big one. How do I look? The way we present ourselves to the world affects the way we are received. Success isn’t all luck as many failures would have us believe.

Friendliness: Do I look people in the eye? Do I show concern for their needs? Am I interested? Being friendly with the world outside the storefront develops our reputation person by person and often brings in to us better opportunities. Owners commit themselves to listening then finding solutions.

Service: Was I able to help people around me today? Did I steer people in the right direction? Did I engage in conversation that was helpful?

Relevance: Was I relevant? Have I striven to become effective in relevant areas of my work, my friends, my family?

If I am a storefront then how do I look? If I am the store, how am I inside and more importantly, how would others rate me? Ultimately we should mostly strive to pass our own rating since the crowd can be fickle. Still, let us never forget that every person’s view of us is, at varying levels, important.

Now, step back and look at yourself: If only for this day, own the storefront, the world will notice.

This is another link-love post. I call these Blog Safaris. I hope you like these links as much as I do.

This week’s Safari (it’s a good one folks!) wheels in at Ginger M’s Useful Things in My Wallet. I love Ginger’s blog. I discovered her writing about three months ago and she’s a blog worth visiting. In between the kids screaming and during those precious breaks at work I always find something artsy, thoughtful and cool at Growing Happiness.

Next, I hit the berm and throw a curtain of mud and then Jeep into Jessica The Rock Chick’s Build Me Up. Most my readers know that I am a big fan of this blog. Jessica used to strive for A-List status at Technorati but she’s come to a realization as I have it seems that the good words are most important. Ranks and social bookmarks feed the image but it’s the words that bring (and keep) the peeps! Her blog Life is RANTastic! is a great read and she’s one of the coolest people on the web as well. I’m lucky I ran across her through a mutual friend.

Next, my Jeep stops at a big read heart (get it?): Chelle’s Free Date Ideas and Free Things… at her blog It Might be Love. I think every person who values love should have this blog on their reading list. It’s just a great idea that plays out post after post as the great idea it is. I also guestblog there from time to time. I have an informative and helpful series coming up there for couples called “Love Homework” so watch for that.
By the way, I ran across a website where you can buy exquisite silk flowers for the lady in your life. Check it out.
The next blogger is a delight. It’s Katelyn’s Feature Friday. Katelyn is always coming up with great ways to grow her blog. This would be a place for the noobs reading to watch and learn. In addition, she is dedicated to Etsy and other passions she writes about on her blog. Check her out.

I heard on the radio that George Carlin died and I was sad about it. He was a true American comic. I was getting tired so I jeeped into the Giraffe Bistro and ordered a thick Espresso. The next thing I knew I discovered that coffee is good for you. Soon after that I found that Twitter might be going under before long, which didn’t bother me much. Finally, I got into some always cool discussions at Blog Catalog.

I turned the muddy Jeep back toward camp after a pretty full day of exploration. Hopefully you found a few spots to take a gander at in your own vehicle of choice. See ya next time.

Okay, so I covered the first two letters of value: “V” for visceral and “A” for aphoristic. Now the third: “L” for linkage! Link love is the #1 way to make friends and influence people (namely bloggers you link to on the web. After you’ve written your visceral post of around 200 words and given it a catchy and creative title, it is important before you press the “publish” button to add 3 deeplinks (links to other posts on your blog) and 3 linkloves (links to other blogs). This can become a standard practice and you will find it easy then. IT IS VERY CUMBERSOME AT FIRST. You need to try and automate the process however you can. It should be like brushing your teeth every morning. Just to give you some of my tips:

1. For backlinks I have a shortcut to my most popular posts page. I open it in a new tab and getting relevant backlinks that are my most popular is as easy as copy/paste. This helps with rank and authrity. It also links your best stuff for people who are interested in it. REMEMBER: The best way to include links is within the context of your writing. Just inserting them random looks like spam and worse than that, it turns off your readers. You can automatically insert links in your blog (I recommend for a 200 word post 3 backlinks and 3 linkloves) and have it enhance your content.
2. For linklove: I use WordPress. As I add new faves to my blogroll, I can go to Manage / links in the admin section an choose the “blank” window feature. Then when I want to get a link open to check out or copy, all I need to do is click. I try to consistently link to my favorite blogs and I notice they really appreciate it. ONE NOTE: Chelle reminded me that the anchor text that the url is assigned to is important to rank, so choose appropriate words. For example: I really like this guy, if guy is the anchor text, then they only get juice for the word guy. If I says: “This guy knows music!” Then you link more effectively to his site about pop culture, music, and being a D.J..

Linkage of external sites along with the 2 types listed above is the third letter in blog value. Coming up tomorrow: The mysterious “U.” Keep following these guidelines and who knows, maybe you’ll be lookin’ into those las vegas hotels

Shelly just published an interview with me at her blog. In it I get the chance, because of her intuitive and thoughtful questions, to share my inspiration and some methods of blogging. If you’d like to check it out, it is at the url below:

thiseclecticlife.com/2008/04/03/interview-with-dam...

Incidentally, it is Shelly and I’s (can you say I’s and still claim to be an MA of English? Well, it sounds good so lay off LOL) Anyway, it is Shelly and I’s “Blogoversary” of meeting … Yes Shelly, it has been ONE YEAR!

How do I know you ask? I keep these things in a small spiral notebook next to my miniature dolls of state and local leaders LOL. No seriously, the first post she ever laughed and commented on here is linked below from April of ‘07. It’s probably one of my favorite pieces of writing I’ve yet to do. If interested, do check it out. Thanks for the friendship Shelly, and here’s to another year of blogging great posts and encouraging others like you do so well.

postcardsfromthefunnyfarm.com/2007/04/19/que-a-fun...